header =  " <table width='100%' border='0' cellspacing='0' cellpadding='0' bgcolor=lightblue >";
header += "     <tr bgcolor=lightblue align=middle>";
header += "       <td>";
header += " <a href=/index.htm><img src=/balloonlogo.jpg></a>";
header += " 	  </td>";
header += "";
header += "";
header += "       <td class='titleword'>";
header += " Welcome to Mooparty, population: you";
header += " 	  </td>";
header += "";
header += "";
header += "       <td bgcolor=lightblue>";
header += "         &nbsp";
header += "       </td>";
header += "                 </tr>";
header += "           </table></div>";
header += "";
header += " <table height=100 border='0' cellspacing='0' cellpadding='1' align=left >";
header += " <BR>";
header += "   <tr>";
header += " 	<td class='sidebarword'>";
header += " 	  <a href=/news/index.htm>news</a>";
header += "    </td>";
header += "   </tr>";
header += "   <tr >";
header += "   	<td class='sidebarword'>";
header += "   	  <a href=/pics/index.htm>pics</a>";
header += "      </td>";
header += "   </tr>";
header += "   <tr  >";
header += "   	<td class='sidebarword'>";
header += "   	  <a href=/links/index.htm>links</a>";
header += "      </td>";
header += "   </tr>";
header += "   <tr  >";
header += "   	<td class='sidebarword'>";
header += "   	  <a href=/contact/index.htm>contacts</a>";
header += "      </td>";
header += "";
header += "   </tr>";
header += " </table>";
header += " <BR><BR>";


function randGen(upperVal)
{	
	var moo = Math.random();
	return Math.ceil(moo*upperVal)-1;
}

function phraseGenerator() {
  var numPeople = 33;
  var numPhrases = 34;
  
  var people = new Array(numPeople);

  people[0]="Curtis Lubben";
  people[1]="Jayme Fagan";
  people[2]="Steve Radojicic";
  people[3]="Jennifer Lopez";
  people[4]="Minh Dang";
  people[5]="Jessica Godinez";
  people[6]="Kimberly Christensen";
  people[7]="Serey Tap";
  people[8]="The Pope";
  people[9]="Thom Yorke";
  people[10]="Damon Albarn";
  people[11]="George Bush";
  people[12]="Pastor Bo Boshers";
  people[13]="Mark McGwire";
  people[14]="Bill Gates";
  people[15]="Ghandi";
  people[16]="Larry King";
  people[17]="Jay Leno";
  people[18]="Richard Gaydick";
  people[19]="Harold Kowalski";
  people[20]="Max Girth";
  people[21]="Jim Bones";
  people[22]="Todd Swanson";
  people[23]="Rutiger Williams";
  people[24]="Some guy";
  people[25]="Apu Nahasapeemipetilon";
  people[26]="Troy Aikman";
  people[27]="Tony Hawk";
  people[28]="Leroy Henderson";
  people[29]="Britney Spears";
  people[30]="Mikey";
  people[31]="Richard Nixon";
  people[32]="John Silva";
  
  var phrase = new Array(numPhrases);
  
  phrase[0]="word";
  phrase[1]="anyone need some life insurance?";
  phrase[2]="is that an HP printer?";
  phrase[3]="get that damn dog out of here";
  phrase[4]="quit talking about my butt, for crying out loud";
  phrase[5]="don't hate the player, hate the game";
  phrase[6]="I'm going to go to the store";
  phrase[7]="on today's menu is a light duck sauce on fucilli";
  phrase[8]="I am the ping pong champion of the universe";
  phrase[9]="what would Jesus do?";
  phrase[10]="I hate this kind of attention";
  phrase[11]="woo hoo";
  phrase[12]="quit comparing me to my father";
  phrase[13]="the day of reckoning is upon us";
  phrase[14]="how about I sock another dinger!";
  phrase[15]="I'm tired of stuffing my pillow with money";
  phrase[16]="me so hungy";
  phrase[17]="I have very snappy glasses";
  phrase[18]="don't mind the dead hooker in the trunk";
  phrase[19]="I'm as straight as the day is long";
  phrase[20]="I'd like a meat on meat sandwich";
  phrase[21]="yes, that is my real name";
  phrase[22]="I'm giving it all I've got, sir";
  phrase[23]="I'm a weiner";
  phrase[24]="I'd rather be sniffing dog poo";
  phrase[25]="dude, what's up with that";
  phrase[26]="you get a free Squishee with every purchase";
  phrase[27]="I can't wait to win the Super Bowl";
  phrase[28]="yes, the stereotypes are true";
  phrase[29]="grip it and rip it";
  phrase[30]="I dream of that hunk Steve on a regular basis";
  phrase[31]="I like it";
  phrase[32]="I am not a crook";
  phrase[33]="I'll be darned";
  
  var name = people[randGen(numPeople)];
  var saying = phrase[randGen(numPhrases)];
  
  return name + " says "+saying;
}