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04/07/2005: "confessions, pt. I"

This is probably old news to some of you, but for the rest of you, these are my confessions.

1. My favorite show in the world is Kenan and Kel, a show for young teens on Nickelodeon. I started watching it when I was twenty years old. I enjoy much of the Teen Nick lineup, and of the currently airing shows, Zoey 101 (starring Britney Spear's sister) is my favorite.

2. I still play the same game I played in high school, Magic: The Gathering. An actual fraction of my yearly salary goes toward it.

3. I am a software engineer by trade, and I enjoy it very much. Despite that, I believe that 99% of all technology actually degrades the quality of life for the human race.

4. I lie...constantly. Whenever I open my mouth theres a good chance a fib will come out. However, I believe that most of my lies are so ridiculous in nature, that they cannot be mistaken for truth. I am sure now I will receive a plethora of comments related to how much of a liar I truly am.

5. I hate saving seats, accepting saved seats, holding place in line or letting people into lines. Its just not fair. I realize that life isn't fair, but I try my best to make sure I'm not contributing to the unfairness.

6. I collect Beanie Babies. Well, just one; Claude the Crab. I probably have between 30 and 40 of them in shoe boxes stuffed around my room.

7. I would one day like to take singing lessons, although I am fairly sure it would be a lost cause.

8. I cry at the movies...alot. Chances are if its a non-action movie, I found some reason to tear up, and chances are that if it's an action movie I fell asleep.

9. I have participated in the last 100 consecutive California Lottery draws. Biggest win: 12 dollars. If I won the lottery I would probably spent most of it on stupid things within the first 48 hours, six months later feel bad about it, and sell all of it.

10. I truly believe that my big toe is of normal size. This is a heated point of argument with anyone else who has seen it.

Well, it felt good to get those out in the open. Have a great day.

Replies: 7 Comments

Your big toe is like one gargantuan monkey fist.

my confession:
i've always loved you.

The John said @ 04/07/2005 08:18 AM PDT

You collect weird shit man.

mimsie said @ 04/07/2005 08:58 AM PDT

Things you left out:
- John is renowned world-over for his innate ability to clear a room (or even a house!) by only a slight movement of his sphincter.
- John would walk around barefoot at all times if it were more socially acceptable
- John only likes music until it becomes mainstream.
- John will eat almost anything for a quarter or a dare (a cup of salad dressing, flaming hot insanity peppers doused in sirracha, a huge spoonful of sour cream, a glass full of onion and beer broth after meat had been cooked in it, and a gazillion McDonald’s cheeseburgers to name a few)

Clarifications:
- John has stated that if his date got up to use the bathroom before a movie started, he would let someone take her seat. That’s a really good way to assure that will be your last date!
- John's big toe is not anywhere close to normal size. It’s bigger than Andre the Giant’s thumb for god’s sake! See here: www.wrestlinginformer.net/Andre_the_Giant.jpg

Maybe you should post a pic of your ginormous toe and have people vote on it :-).

Jayme said @ 04/07/2005 12:28 PM PDT

Thanks Jayme, you've been a terrific help :)

John said @ 04/07/2005 05:06 PM PDT

I do what I can :-).

Jayme said @ 04/08/2005 09:36 AM PDT

and my favorite... john does not approve of using any object for more than its intended purpose--one thing, one use. so, for instance, don't try to do origami on a hardcover book (that's what tables are for!).

to clarify the "seat in a movie" statement... if his date went to the bathroom and someone tried to take her seat, he would get up as well. so at least they would be standing in the back together. :-D

tiff said @ 04/11/2005 08:14 AM PDT

I have a confession too:

8 gigs of Taylor Rain downloaded today. My crack whore fetish is getting out of hand. Needless to say, I love BitTorrent now.

Support Your Local Library said @ 04/14/2005 06:21 PM PDT